I don’t love my suffering. Saints embraced theirs. They even asked for
it. It won them halos, while here I am, avoiding pain whenever possible but
still offering it all up, because, well, it is heavenly collateral after all.
it. It won them halos, while here I am, avoiding pain whenever possible but
still offering it all up, because, well, it is heavenly collateral after all.
But I think I found an avenue suggested by saints and a priest that
still leads to sainthood minus the direct love affair with suffering.
still leads to sainthood minus the direct love affair with suffering.
If I can
appreciate what comes my way through suffering and the other blessings that
suffering often reveals, then I can reap the benefits. Thus, gratitude can be
the spoonful of sugar that helps the medicine go down.
appreciate what comes my way through suffering and the other blessings that
suffering often reveals, then I can reap the benefits. Thus, gratitude can be
the spoonful of sugar that helps the medicine go down.
Mother Teresa knew this when she said, “Gratitude to God is to accept
everything, even my problems with joy.”
She did not say we have to love the problems themselves, but to
accept them with joy.
everything, even my problems with joy.”
She did not say we have to love the problems themselves, but to
accept them with joy.
A friend taught me this years ago when he shared his story for the Amazing
Grace for Families book after losing his only son. After the death of his
beloved son Josh, Steve Cates felt angry with God.
Grace for Families book after losing his only son. After the death of his
beloved son Josh, Steve Cates felt angry with God.
“Steve,” his wife Cathy said, “we can’t be angry. Think of the gift God
gave us for twenty-six years. We’ve talked about all the good things about
Josh. Look at what we’ve had.”
gave us for twenty-six years. We’ve talked about all the good things about
Josh. Look at what we’ve had.”
In an instant, Cathy’s words cut through his anger. “God does not want
us to be thankful for everything, he
wants us to be thankful in all
things,” she said. “Then you will look up instead of looking down.”
us to be thankful for everything, he
wants us to be thankful in all
things,” she said. “Then you will look up instead of looking down.”
St. Padre Pio embraced his own suffering but when people came to him
wanting to add suffering into their lives, he told them to stop that. God would
give them all the suffering they needed, he explained. They just needed to
respond with acceptance.
wanting to add suffering into their lives, he told them to stop that. God would
give them all the suffering they needed, he explained. They just needed to
respond with acceptance.
Gratitude offers a way to find joy in the midst of difficulties. I have
found it to be a two-step grace. First, offer up the suffering since when aligned
with the cross of Christ, it is an offering that can answer prayers and draw us
nearer to God. The second step is gratitude. I have never said: Thanks for my suffering, but I can find
endless appreciations within suffering, from having a roof over my head and
food in my cupboards to my Catholic faith and the graces the suffering will
bring.
found it to be a two-step grace. First, offer up the suffering since when aligned
with the cross of Christ, it is an offering that can answer prayers and draw us
nearer to God. The second step is gratitude. I have never said: Thanks for my suffering, but I can find
endless appreciations within suffering, from having a roof over my head and
food in my cupboards to my Catholic faith and the graces the suffering will
bring.
Fr. Kovash on Gratitude
This past Lent, Father Russ Kovash, pastor of St. Joseph in Williston,
ND gave a retreat on “Gratitude
is the Virtue That Changes Us.” He shared how gratitude changed his
life to the point that he now thanks God for the things he used to complain
about.
ND gave a retreat on “Gratitude
is the Virtue That Changes Us.” He shared how gratitude changed his
life to the point that he now thanks God for the things he used to complain
about.
The transformation came 8 years ago through the “rosary of gratitude”
he learned from his friend Patty Schneier
who had a spiritual director recommend it to her. “I won’t go to sleep
without praying it now,” he said.
he learned from his friend Patty Schneier
who had a spiritual director recommend it to her. “I won’t go to sleep
without praying it now,” he said.
 |
| Father Russel Kovash |
It is simply prayed by taking a rosary and thanking God for something
on each bead of the 5 decades— from the smallest to the biggest blessings. “When
gratefulness is alive in our hearts,” Father Kovash said, “it lends itself to 3
fruits: a deep abiding peace and joy, a tremendous increase in the awareness of
God’s crazy blessings in our lives, and those 2 things result in a great
passion to do God’s will and build up his kingdom.”
on each bead of the 5 decades— from the smallest to the biggest blessings. “When
gratefulness is alive in our hearts,” Father Kovash said, “it lends itself to 3
fruits: a deep abiding peace and joy, a tremendous increase in the awareness of
God’s crazy blessings in our lives, and those 2 things result in a great
passion to do God’s will and build up his kingdom.”
Gratitude is not just good for us, but God actually commands it of us, Father
Kovash explained. Many Scripture passages teach us that we are obligated by God
to thank him such as 1Thessalonians 5:18: “Give thanks in all circumstances;
for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.”
Kovash explained. Many Scripture passages teach us that we are obligated by God
to thank him such as 1Thessalonians 5:18: “Give thanks in all circumstances;
for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.”
He also pointed out that in the Eucharistic prayer at Mass we say: “Let
us give thanks to the Lord our God. It is right and just.”often
us give thanks to the Lord our God. It is right and just.”often
Praying the rosary of gratitude is life changing, according to Father
Kovash. “There have been many fruits, and it has brought me deep abiding peace
and joy in my life to see how ridiculously good God has been in my life,” he
said. “I thank him today for blessings that 8 years ago I would not have even
thanked him for or maybe I would have complained about them.”
Kovash. “There have been many fruits, and it has brought me deep abiding peace
and joy in my life to see how ridiculously good God has been in my life,” he
said. “I thank him today for blessings that 8 years ago I would not have even
thanked him for or maybe I would have complained about them.”
~~~~~~
For more inspiration check out Patti’s latest book: Holy Hacks: Everyday Ways to Live Your Faith & Get to Heaven. Other books include: Big Hearted: Inspiring Stories from Everyday Families and the best-selling Amazing Grace Series.
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